Team Archive: Team Comedy Quartet
Ryuzaki's P.O.V (As most of the rest of the chapter be)
You may be wondering 'Do I really have to read this? Is this even a bit relevant to the Cray Collapse triology/possible triology?' Why yes it is, my good dude or dudette. This is 100% canon. You may also be thinking that there wil be warnings about when the Point Of View changes but guess what? The writer is very unprofessional so there won't be any warnings! Isn't that wonderful? By the way, if you swipe the videoabove to the side, you'll see the cover. If you are in a computer, that is.
As the flames at the end of a long hospital halway kept growing in slow motion, the walls crumbling to bits as the explosion expanded, a big muscular man in a pink nurse outfit, who was pushing a wheelchair that had non other than a hot white haired clone with red eyes and the vest of someone who had been in the hospital for days, ran past the entrance that connected the straight halway to one in it's left. As the duo hurried it's tracks to escape the incoming explosion, the big man decided that there was only one way out: the window in front of them.
"Ryuzu..." The man spoke as he ran and pushed the wheelchair. "DON'T SPENT A FULL HOUR ON MCDONALDS AGAIN! YOU'RE HEAVY AS SHIT!"
"We get it, Maverick! Now jump through the window! Death by skyfall feels more enjoyable than explosion!" The white haired shouted. That sexy snow haired boy was none other than yours truly, Ryuzaki Mikazuchi. The big nurse is my brudda Maverick. He is the John Diggle to my Oliver Queen, the Cisco Ramon to my Barry Allen and even the Mick Rory to my Leonard Snart... Ok maybe not that last one. Maverick isn't a dumb dumb. He plays Nubatama.
As the flames expanded even faster, Maverick and Ryuzaki broke through the window and feel to what could possibly be their death. Was that the end of our not very smart heores?
Not really. With his left hand, Maverick held the wheelchair, but his right hand was holding the bars on the right side of a helicopter.
"Good timing, Payic!" Maverick spoke.
"Nah man, it's me!" A young boy replied to the muscular wannabe nurse.
"What are you doing here, Iku?!" Maverick asked as used his left closed fist to hit the side of the helicopter. "Payic should be here piloting!"
"Hey, it's Inu! Not Iku! Where's the boss?!"
"Ryuzu is... SHIT!" Maverick shouted as he saw the wheelchair skydiving. He could hear the remnants of the words 'Iku and Inu are the same' going through the air.
You may wondering 'YES! Finally Ryuzaki dies! No more of a dumb Shida character here!'. Oh no, my friend. I don't die in my own story. What happens next may shock you.
"I was joking about diving in a skyfall!" Ryuzaki said to himself as he pressed a buton on the left wheel of the chair, causing a parachute to open and save the life of the white haired. "That was close." It was at this moment that I knew that I had been a fucknut for since the day I installed the parachute in the wheelchair. On other words, yesterday. The wind was blowing a bit stronged than calculated, so instead of just floating in a straight line, the wheelchair was pushed to the skies have a road going diagonally down and slowly landed on the road, going straight down due to the laws of physics. Ryuzaki was sliding down the road but he wasn't alone. There were cards that also wanted the road and so, he had to dogde them as quickly as possible. "Medigate really seemed like a good option now!" He shouted.
But before he could hit a car and go to hell, a white van approached him and the back doors of it opened it, revealing a black haired girl.
"Come in, Ryuzaki!" The girl said as she grabbed the white haired by his hair and pulled him into the van, closing the door and letting the wheelchair hit some card.
"Thanks for the quick save, Pay-"
"What was your idea genius?! Greatest minds of this generation my ass! You're gonna get us deported from Portugal at this rate! You can't go around blowing up hospitals!!!" The girl shouted at the boy ears.
"Sweet jesus, my ears hurt after that. And the hospital was technically abandoned. Besides, we didn't blow it up! It was a bomb some rival company implanted. Also, why is Iku in the chopper?"
"Because someone had to drive the van. And I think it's Inu."
Ryuzaki shrugged. "Eh, same crap. Wait, who the ehck is driving this thing?"
"The A.I. you made." Payic replied as she sat down at he driver's seat and took control of the van. "You got me worried."
"Eh, minor. Either way, contact Maverick and Inu, tell them to meet back at the temporary mansion."
"I can't believe you got a mansion just for this small trip."
"What can I say? I'm a rich bastard." Ryuzaki replied as he got dressed in his usual clothes. "I wanted some place near the Belem Tower and the hotels weren't being too nice."
From here on out, me and Payic just drove back to the mansion. We met the rest of the team around 8pm, maybe later.
"That was the most awesome thing!" Inu said, shoving a big spoon of rice in his mouth.
"Don't talk with your mouth full, Inu!" Payic warned.
"Yes, 'mom'. Still can't believe you got dressed in some pink nurse clothes. It was the most hilarious thing ever!"
"Hey! We had to make the disguise believable some how." Maverick replied with a smirk.
"Those damn clothes made my balls itch for two whole hours."Ryuzaki spoke as he ate some fish.
"Maybe Payic can help you solve-" Before Maverick ended his sentence, he was hit a nice big book in the face.
"Yeah, no. I had my fair share of pervs."
Ryuzaki and Inu chukled at each other before turning to Payic. "Hey Payic." The both said on an angelic unison.
"Yes?"
The two smirked at her before trying to make a very Yza-ish vocie. "Are your boobs real?"
"Why you little shits!"
At the end of the day, the three of us, the boys of the group, had been bitch slapped with dictionary at least two times. Let me just say that those things aren't very light. They are least the double of Iku's weight. But after all of the funny and dank moments, I decided to go to my balcony alone. I place my cold hands into my warm pockets. It felt shiongasmic. It felt like taking a piss after holding it for a hour or more. Like I said, shiongasmic. I looked up at the sky. Beautiful. Maybe not as beautiful as some of the female bodies I've seen over the years but lady night was sure in the top ten. But then, it happened. I saw a small flash of purple light fall from the skies above into the waters surrounding the Belem Tower. I looked at it. I looked at it like if it was the most important thing ever.
"Sweet sweaty balls, what in the world is this?" I said to myself as I observed the waters with a small glow of temporary purple. It was then that I felt my phone vibrate.
I grabbed it. It was a call from someone named "VoDkAmAn BaDsHuFfLeR". I knew exaclty who it was. I placed the phone near my right ear and I answered it.
"Zdravstvuyte, Ryuzaki." The strong voice with an even stronger russian accent spoke.
"What up Vodkaman, got anything juice for me?"
"Game update is near end. Fish tail wamen going to hit game in two hour."
"Good. Gonna play some sweet waifus today. Better have made the shuffler better."
"Shuffler stays same."
"Ok ok, fine. What about the thicc Arka?"
"Will think about it."
"Moeggido?"
"Will think about it.""
"Seems fair."
"One more thing."
"Yeah?"
"White glow fall near home. No sound. No destruction. Just fall on snow. No man or wamen seen it."
"I see... Yous aid it was white?"
"Like your hair, al'binos."
"I see. Got something more?"
"Friend says yellow glow fall near big clock in Tecountry."
"In what?"
"Te-coun-try?"
"What?!"
"Country of boy who gets Esras in damage zone."
"How many of them?"
"Three before first stride."
"So... England?"
"Yellow glow fall on Britainland. Know no more."
"Alright. Thanks for info. Talk to you later."
"Do svidaniya, ublyudok ."
With that, we ended the call. I headed inside and looked at a small white board in the wall.
I grabbed the first marker that appeared and wrote the name Yza in the center. Then, I conncted it to a purle circle, a white circle and yellow circle.
"Portugal, Russia and England... No connection other than shit that happened before 2000. But then, the question is raised." I wrote the name Yozora under Yza and conencted the names. "What's the connection between you two? I guess tje first thing I'll have to do when I get back to Japan is get near you, Mr. Shinsei. Luckily for me, spring break ends in a month." I backed away from the board and stared at it.
There was some connection. Yza and Yozora, aswell as the countries of England, Russia and Portugal. What was it? I was gonna find out.
Now I was gonna have a little sketch with our good ol' pal Nathaniel but it only seemed stupid. Besides, I'm already breaking the 4th wall and we don't wanna break any more of them. I hope you enjoyed this little canon story. Will Team Comedy Quartet return fo their own little story? Maybe on day. But until then, I'll just wave you goddbye and say toodles.
Oh, by the way. This is the part where you play the music on the media. It's the end credits. Ok toodles!
Starring...
A white haired bastard
A muscular man who isn't a dumb dumb
Some kid that who's name we never get right
A big boobed hottie who's boobs became a meme
With the special participation of a russian dude
And... lots of references to the protags of the main series
Produced and writen by a portuguese dumb dumb
Cover made by the best girl in this whole Vanguard community
Cray Collapse triology writen by a dude who can never sack on Area
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This is canon, ladies and gentlmen.
Little_Cute_Cookie made the cover. Thank you!
8mefox is responsabke for this being reality. Thank you!
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