Located in a cave behind a waterfall the shadowy figures all grumbled to each other.

"What is the plan, sir? If the new one's reports are true then he is returning." One of the voices spoke up.

"I know that imbecile! I'm thinking of a plan." The figure snapped his fingers. "A-hah! Let's keep with the theme of today, get me the famous presidents. The ones on the money! But don't take them from any point that could affect time!"

The newest figure nodded and vanished for a moment, returning with teenage versions of George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, and Abraham Lincoln.

"Why are they teenagers?"

"They're too busy with meetings as adults sir, this is the only time they're free!"

"Where am I?" George Washington asked.

"Oh right almost forgot. Hypnotize them!" A light flashed from one of the figures and all three presidents were under their control.

"Perfect! I've created a trap! Alright, presidents here's your assignment! Take these probes and put them in Mabel and Dipper Pine's ears!"

"Yes, sir!" They said in monotone voices, each taking a set of probes and leaving the cave with evil grins.

"Soon my plan will be complete! The probes will destroy their minds and The Dark One will suffer pain far greater than even we did! AHAHAHAHAHA!"

Theme Song.

https://youtu.be/Z6usKhzL8uI

Commercial.

Dipper, Mabel, Stan, Ford, Soos, and Wendy were walking through the Fourth of July Town Fair. Everyone was celebrating their patriotism by lighting sparklers, having cotton candy, or paying money to compete in rigged games.

"I don't remember them doing this last year," Dipper noted.

"That's because our old mayor didn't believe in patriotism unless it was our own town," Stan explained.

"Well, at least Tyler's doing something different," Dipper concluded.

"I never saw the whole fourth of July celebration. It wasn't even the day America won the war, it was just the start of it. Mabel do you know what day America won the war?"

"Uhm. Septembuary?"

"I thought it was Christmas Eve," Dipper said.

"No that was just a major victory, the war was officially ended on September Third. But instead, we only celebrate the day the declaration was signed. And even then I've been to dimensions where America never signed the Declaration of Independence, I just don't see why everyone's so crazy about it."

"You know nothing about the business side of it. Slap red, white, and blue on something and you can double the price just because of one day! Suckers will buy whatever they tell you. Really it's my second most profitable holiday, the first being Christmas." Stan explained to them.

Wendy scoffed. "Everyone knows Valentine's day is full of way more suckers who will buy you cheesy cards for three times the regular price."

"Hey! I'm one of those suckers!" Soos protested.

"Well, I like it! Besides I get to wear my patriot sweater!" Mabel said, wearing a sweater that looked identical to the American flag. The stars even blinked with red, white, and blue lights.

One of the stations set up was Manly Dan vs Old Man McGuckett, Manly Dan had a picture of an American flag taped to him and Old Man McGuckett had a picture of a British flag taped to his hat.

"Get 'im! Get 'im!" Tyler chanted.

"Yeehaw! Take this!" Old Man McGuckett shouted, and he took a remote from his beard and pressed a button on it, a giant drill exploded from the ground and morphed into a robot. Manly Dan punched it and the robot didn't seem phased, it picked him up and threw him through the roof of a building.

"Dad!" Wendy shouted and she ran to where her father had landed.

"Yippee! I win!" Old Man McGuckett cheered for himself, he threw his hands into the air, throwing the remote off into who-knows-where.

"Well, that was the opposite of how it was supposed to go," Dipper concluded.

"I liked the robot! I wonder if he does parties?" Mabel said.

"Yeah, that dude would be great for my next big birthday bash!" Soos agreed.

"Don't you guys remember the last time McGuckett had a robot? He almost killed us and told us all about the times he used robots to cause mass destruction." Dipper reminded them.

Ford sighed, feeling guilty for causing his friend's insanity once again.

"Hey don't worry about it Ford! At least he's better now." Stan reminded his brother.

"Well anyways I want some cotton candy! Let's get some!" Mabel said, grabbing Soos and her brother's hands and dragging them to the cotton candy stand.

As they arrived they saw Blendin Blandon knock out the man and look over to them, he yelped and hit a button on his watch and vanished, reappearing a second later with his back turned to them and dressed as the man.

"We know it's you Blendin," Dipper told him.

Blendin groaned. "Darn it! Oooh, I knew I should've done it sooner! Anyways where's your Great Uncle, the smart one? I have a message for him."

"Dude can't you just tell us, you still owe us for starting Weirdmaggeden and trying to kill us," Dipper said.

"Fine. Shermy's-" Just then the teenage presidents burst onto the scene.

"There they are! Dipper and Mabel Pines!" Abraham pointed at them.

"And over there is the Evil One and his brother!" Thomas pointed at Stan and Ford.

"The mast would be pleased if we probed his brother as well, and we have enough to probe all three of them," George said taking out his ax, Abraham pulled out a pistol he'd picked up n the way and Thomas ran to a prize stand, stole a spear, and ran back to join the other two.

"Let's get them!"

Commercial.

George and Thomas charged at Dipper, Mabel, Soos, and Blendin while Abraham went for Stan. Everyone ran off trying to not get murdered by the teenage presidents. Dipper, Mabel, Soos, and Blendin took cover in the woods, hiding behind some bushes.

Stan ran into a building to avoid Abraham's gun. Ford ran at Abraham and knocked the gun from his hand, the two then engaged in hand to hand combat.

After George and Thomas had passed over the group Dipper asked Blendin who they were.

"They're George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, and Abraham Lincoln as teenagers!" Blendin told them. "That means someone is conducting unauthorized time travel! I must get to the bottom of this!"

"And what was all that weird talk about probing you guys?" Soos wondered.

"And since when have the presidents been evil?" Mabel spoke up.

"They must be under mind control by some time traveling force to get rid of you kids! It's the perfect plan! You can't fight back or else history will be changed forever as the presidents will never become presidents and they get to use some of the most tactical minds in history!" Blendin concluded.

"When did you get so smart?" Dipper asked.

"I've been watching lots of Film Theory."

Soos chuckled. "Please anyone can tell most of their theories are pointless!"

"So how do we stop them?" Mabel asked.

"Simple, I just have to return them to their time and they must be freed from the mind control," Blendin replied.

"How do we do that?" Mabel wondered.

Dipper snapped his fingers. "Maybe if we can knock them out we can stop the hypnosis? No that'll never work. Wait let's reverse hypnotize them! We can hypnotize them to be un-hypnotized! I just need to get them all in the Mystery Shack and in a position where they can't kill me."

"So we have to restrain them. But they've got weapons." Blendin said.

Mabel jumped up with a grin on her face. "I have a plan."

Ford and Abraham were wrestling on the ground. "Curse my old limbs!" Ford shouted, punching Abraham in the face.

"Give it up Evil One!" Abraham shouted, elbowing Ford in the face and sitting on his back, then he grabbed Ford's arm and held it behind his back. "Now be a good boy and wait here while I probe your brother."

"Leave Stanford alone!" Stan shouted, charging outside and punching Abraham across the face and shoving him off Ford. "Ford hand me his gun!" Ford gave Stan a horrified look. "I'm not going to... I'm going to use it to keep him from attacking us!" Ford handed Stan the gun and he held it to Abraham's head.

"Don't move, or I shoot."

"Go ahead! You'll be the one who suffers!" Abraham laughed, then he kicked Stan in the chest and uppercut him, Stan fell to the ground completely knocked out. "Now to put the probes in!"Abraham moved towards Stan with two small devices in his hands when Ford roundhouse kicked him. Abraham dropped the probes and Ford picked them up, stuffing them in his pocket.

"Give those back Evil One!" Abraham demanded.

"Nobody hurts my brother." Ford picked up the gun but before he could act a horse stampeded onto the scene, atop it was a man riding it backward, none other than Sir Quentin Trembley.

"Mr. Rocks halt! We've arrived!"

Commercial.

"Who the heck are you?" Ford asked.

"I'm Sir Quentin Trembly! The eighth and a half president and the founder of Gravity Falls!"

"Dipper told me all about you. But I figured you'd gotten yourself killed."

"Nigh! I simply continued my war on pancakes! But now I have much more important business! That man is none other than Abraham Lincoln, the second biggest jerk to run the United States!"

"Who the heck's a Quentin Trembly?" Abraham asked.

"Oh don't play dumb! You ended my war on pancakes you jerk!" Quentin shouted.

"Hm. Yes, now I see it. This appears to be a teenage version of Abraham Lincoln." Ford concluded. "He also appears to be under hypnosis. Time Baby must be fooling around again."

"Alright dad, you go home and rest. Oh hey, guys. What happened here?" Wendy asked, walking out of the building she'd been in for a while.

"You young lady! Come with me! You're the only one who can stop George Washington and Thomas Jefferson from killing your friends!" Quentin told Wendy.

"What the heck?" Wendy asked.

"It's a long story Wendy. But he's correct. I and Stan are in no condition to be going anywhere." Ford said, restraining Abraham.

"Well if Dipper and Mabel are in trouble then I guess I've got no choice," Wendy said.

"Then climb aboard and we shall ride off!" Quentin Trembley told her.

"I'm not getting on a horse backward," Wendy said.

"Fine then! Onward Mr. Rocks!" Quentin kicked the horse and it sped off into the woods, Wendy chased after him with her ax in hand.

Quentin had come to a full stop, looking around, which gave Wendy time to catch up to him. "I sense a threat. There!" He pointed at a squirrel. "Don't move you monster."

"Dude come on we don't have time to mess around! We gotta save my friends!" Wendy told him.

"You need to relax young lady, or you'll never win. These presidents are strong. You cannot out-muscle them. You must out-silly them." Quentin advised.

"What do you know? You're just some crazy old man!" Wendy snapped.

"I might be crazy but I'm not insane!"

"They're the same thing!" Wendy screamed. "Ugh, you're no help! You're just a waste of my time. I'm going to find my friends!" Wendy stormed off, clutching her ax tightly. "I don't need to listen to some stupid old guy! I can do this all by myself! He's just a handicap!"

Mabel, Dipper, Blendin, and Soos were searching the bushes for the key part of Mabel's plan.

"Come on. Where is it?" Mabel wondered.

"It's gotta be somewhere..." Dipper said.

"If only we could see where it landed," Soos said.

"Wait I can just go back in time and check!" Blendin realized, but before he could time travel Thomas Jefferson leaped from one of the bushes and tried to hit him with his spear. Blendin dove to the said with a shout. Thomas raised his spear over Blendin but Quentin's horse slapped into him and knocked Thomas down.

Quentin Trembly jumped off his horse. "I say! It's the world's worst president!"

"Sir Quentin Trembly! You're back!" Mable grinned.

Dipper sighed. "Oh boy."

"Who's this guy?" Soos asked.

"The eighth and a half president!" Mabel told him.

"President? Of what?" Thomas Jefferson asked. "Whatever!" He pointed his spear at Quentin.

"If it's a fight you want then it's a fight you'll get! I am a master fencer after all!" Quentin warned and he took out a piece of a broken fence. "En garde!" The two began battling to the death, Quentin was gaining ground against Thomas when Thomas swept him off his feet.

"Ca-caw!" Quentin shouted, a woodpecker flew down and tried to destroy Thomas's spear, he swatted at it.

"Get out of here you annoying bird!"

Quentin stood back up and hit Thomas over the head with the piece of fence. "Victory has been achieved!"

"That was awesome!" Mabel praised.

Soos nodded. "Great technique dude."

"I did not see that coming," Dipper stated.

"Now we only need to find George Washington. Wait, I can sense his jerkiness!" Quentin turned and pointed at where George Washington was standing with a smirk.

"Oh no, you found me. Well, look what I found." George showed them the remote and pressed a button on it. Suddenly the same drill burst from the ground and it morphed into the robot once more. Two of its hands turned into smaller drills and it fired a laser at a nearby tree for good measure. "Destroy them!"

"Leave my friends alone!" Wendy shouted, charging at George with her ax in hand. George countered with his own ax and the two began battling, Wendy was good but George was better. Every time Wendy had a chance to strike she couldn't because she knew it could alter history before long Wendy had been knocked to the ground and defeated and everyone was cowering in fear as the robot loomed over them.

"Wendy! Remember, you cannot beat a T-Rex in football! Instead, challenge him to chess!" Quentin shouted to her.

"Ha! It's over! Nobody can out-muscle George Washington!" George smirked.

"That's it! I can't out-muscle you! Instead of playing football, I should be playing chess!" Wendy realized, she tossed her ax into the air at a branch, the ax sliced the branch and it came tumbling down, George scrambled back to avoid it.

"You might be a master strategist but you can't plan for the unexpected!" Wendy told him and instead of catching her ax as it landed she let it get impaled in the branch. Then she ran forward and jumped into the air, using the ax's hilt as extra leverage to grab a branch above George.

"You can't escape me!" George vowed and he began climbing the tree. Wendy tossed pine cones at him from a distance. By the time he reached her branch he was covered in bruises from all the high-velocity pine cones and exhausted from the climb. "You... haven't.... won...." He panted. Then he took out his ax and charged at Wendy.

Wendy smirked and ran to the edge of the branch and jumped off, grabbing onto the branch with her hand, George realized her plan too late and fell off, Wendy grabbed him by the collar and used his falling momentum to swing him and throw him into the trunk, knocking out the teenage president.

Wendy climbed down the tree and picked up the remote, deactivating the robot and then tied up George and Thomas.

"Wendy that was awesome! I never would've thought to use pine cones!" Dipper told her.

Wendy shrugged. "Well, I realized an ax's greatest weakness is its lack of range, so I tired him out and used distance to my advantage. I couldn't have done it without Quentin's advice though."

"Indeed! You play a mean game of chess!" Quentin complimented.

"Sorry I said you were insane, you're actually pretty smart," Wendy told him.

"Don't worry about it girl. I knew you'd realize in time! Now that my job has been done I must continue my war on pancakes. Good luck children! And I leave you with this final warning. Powerful enemies are rising! Prepare yourselves with syrup or the bacon will surely fail! Goodbye children!" Quinten hopped onto his horse and rode off backward.

"What was that all about?" Soos wondered.

"He's probably still talking about pancakes!" Mabel suggested.

"Well anyways, Blendin you were saying something about our Grandfather Sherman?" Dipper remembered.

"I'll explain everything after the presidents are returned to their proper time and un-hypnotized. And I wasn't talking about your grandfather. I was talking about your uncle." Blendin said.

Commercial.

Credits.

"We've failed again! And he is returning! Enough hiding and acting in the shadows. It is time to make ourselves known! We will show them just how strong they are by taking their town away from them!" The shadowing figure told the others.

"Yes, sir." They said.

"Please no more of this sir stuff. Call me. EyeGnome."

*A/N So here's an update on the schedule. I want to air these every Thursday at 6:00 PM EST. I know it's a bit of an odd date but I like it so I'm going to give it a try. Also two big twists in one chapter. Unfortunately, you'll have to wait until next week. Well, that's everything, thanks for reading and have a great day! BYE!*