Never before had Citrinemoon noticed how time was so much like water; that it could pass slowly, a drop at a time, even freeze, or rush by in a blink. In this slow time-bubble the birdsong was louder, coldness was colder and colours were brighter. All the while her insides felt as if there was nothing there, nothing to feed, nothing to have anything at all.

Memories danced around her head, taunting and laughing at how she was left in the dust. Normally, she would throw whatever life tossed to her as a challenge back, but this time, she was at a loss for words.

She could not hear anything. Time seemed to freeze. She could feel her heart being torn open by force, or being stepped on by a giant without a backward glimpse. She could see how the blood formed waterfalls that cascaded from highground. How it mushed together with the green and brown until it swallowed all the colours like a beast.

She could not explain what she was seeing. As if a naughty kid mixed all the colours on the colour plate and splattered them on the white canva, the colours were slowly being torn apart and smashed together violently in front of her eyes.

Everything will be alright.

Everything will be alright.

That sounded like the biggest joke ever made because things were definitely NOT alright. Losing your mother was definitely not alright. Losing your mate was definitely not alright. Losing your son was definitely not alright. Having a father that never casted you a glance and never loved you back was definitely not alright.

In fact, nothing in her life was alright. She could not throw the truths behind, all her feelings behind and knit a beautiful web of lies for herself. She could not wrap herself tightly with millions of imaginations, shedding herself with lies and more lies. The small lies that she constantly fed herself could not stop her from seeing the world crumbling in front of her. Her world.

Lies became her way of escaping, but they would never be her remedy. It would only tear her apart