QOTC

You know what's awful? Oblivion. - ?

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Sakura Haruno

I am in pain. I am fat with the most indolent unexplainable lush of wrath. Today is the day I've pronounced myself as demon and demon. My mind shakes, I feel as if something is ripping through me coming from my abdomen and no one can help me. The clinic was worthless. I am hopeless. In short, even Kiba's humor wouldn't arouse me. If Naruto kisses me, I'm going to pummel his equipment despite that I've been wanting a kiss from somebody today. A hungry craving. A little shred of delight I cannot have, because I'm on my period. My sweet, homecoming period, and—-unlike Kakashi—-its timing is perfect.

Naruto gives me a list of I can't accomplish this day: I can't run. I can't jump. I can't work my ass on P.E, or even try to make my way running without involving anything that smudges on my butt. I hate it. I hate it when you get to be cursed for three days (sometimes weeks) on your life and it feels like an entire year. Why? You bring at least three packs of napkin(one time Kiba was borrowing a pencil and I was laying my head on my armchair, tired as hell. I asked him to get my bag himself and he took them out, mistakenly and a bit gratefully.), and if there is a time you just want to sit on the toilet all day and let all your dirt go, this is it. It is excruciating and unfair.

Why don't men bleed?

A subject that crossed my mind early this morning. I had been listening to a song called Don't Look Down on my ear pods all the way to school. Since Neji was right next to me, we would sometimes chat and sometimes decide to keep our thoughts quiet and unsaid, knowing Math and not knowing Math, I didn't cling to him like a leech. I did his essays while he helped me out with all the algebra equations and terrifying shits.

I asked him once of his family. How it must have been "bold" to lead one of the most successful clans in company. Neji barely spoke of it during parties (who would talk of their family relations, anyway? That's private territory, you idiot!) and it quite ticked the little gold coin of interest in my chest. What's it like, big guy? A Hyuga. I said. Do you bleed? Do you get hurt? You have everything.

Everything. What I mean is how when it rained with bunch of handsomeness, intelligence, bravery and best in conduct and excellence awardee, Neji must have been awake holding a bucket. Catching all the ideal personalities a girl wants from a boy. TenTen obviously has a thing for him; I see it every damn time. I'm not sure if she wants him to be aware of it, or if he 'does' know, the result is so... Unpredictable.

This time, Neji does not accept my complement. This time, Neji tells me a short story of how he ended up as Hinata's guardian. I didn't know much of the Hyuga affairs, I just knew that where there are places of power, conflict rises. Neji believes his destiny is to watch after his younger cousin for the rest of his life, and, even possible—-sacrifice himself if a tumult happens to her.

"That's awful." I simply say as if I'm the tree of wisdom. A psychiatrist.

"You know what's awful?" Neji asks, still staring at the items on the board. "Oblivion."

"You have got to be joking. Do you even see the future?"

"No and no. Sadly, my vision gets blurry these days. Especially on Happy Thursdays. Kiba doesn't let me out until I drink a straight dozen shots of Pina Colada."

I copy some of the notes on Neji's notebook since I have a feeling I might need glasses soon. "So, can you like know all the answers of the class if we get a quiz?" I ask, feeling my menstration slowing. Thank Kami.

"Of course I do." Neji says, waiting for irritation and envy swallow my face with red, burning cheeks. What an asshole.

"That is so unfair!"

"Keep your voice down or we'll both end up under Disciplinary Probation." 

"Ino's the first, who's the second?" 'Hinata???'

"TenTen, who else would it be?"

"Oh."

I cancel the words written on my plain black journal. Men do bleed. They have shadows, too. Dark ones. They just—-perhaps they don't want other people to see it, neither themselves. I would kill to see a boy cry.

"You do realize everyone's writing. That means everyone's bored, and most of us are probably writing and doodling some nonsense." I say, which is evidently true. "Can you read an interesting nonsensical nothingness to me?"

Neji activate his White Eye, and there I see it. The roots that give him zero disadvantage in eyesight. He scans the room, utterly challenged. "Temari is trying to draw dresses. I think he wants to go for Interior Designing for college." Neji continues, his eyes gazing elsewhere. "Obito has a world map inside inside his bag. There's nothing unusual on Shino's sheet. Lee is drawing a picture of him and Gai-sensei." He shakes his head and continues, "Hinata is..."

"What?" I ask. There is nothing I find afraid in Hinata. In fact I even glare at her, trying to make up for whatever Neji was supposed to say to me, but never did.

"Nothing..." Neji turns his head towards his window. I think of how he and Hinata are so much alike. Hiashi and Hizashi, two fathers devoted to their family and children. If Hizashi looks so much like Hiashi, and Hiashi reminds everyone of Neji, aren't they a single family at all?

Miraculously, the final bell rings. Everyone in class acts as if nothing has happened. They pray and sing the hymn to Hashirama while I stare at the open door.

A little more while, my patience will finally pay off.

Ring! The bell calls now. Go, go, go home and screw your homeworks! 

I make my way to Sai. He's packing his stuffs, still, breezy boy who calls himself an artist.

I smack him the cheek.

Sai drops down into the floor, blood shredding from his bottom lip. At least the floor didn't crack.

"What was that for??" Ino says.

I look at Sai. He isn't in pain. He wipes his lip with a hand, as if it were a brush that can paint things as he wanted. Cool jerk.

"That's for making fun of Sasuke."

Sai is a good boy who is quiet, reserved, observant. I've admired boys like that—-it turns me on that they know a time to be clangorous and to shut the hell up. Sai respects others' ideals and beliefs, strengths, talents, what's the catch? He's a dick. A complete pile of a stoic ass hiding on one fake smile. If he doesn't stop, I will kill him.

Ino's huge mouth didn't keep him from learning what everyone thought he was: Sasuke. As if he was a celebrity who vanished on TV and appeared once more, ready to take claim of his fame. Sai didn't want any of that. In fact he didn't want to be like Sasuke. Ino says, you know you really look like him. Sasuke. Sai hears you look like our dropped student who got addicted to drugs and things like that. Blah blah blah.

It was close to dismissal, anyway, Captain Yamato was teaching Music. I am not a bitch. I am not doing anything out of rage. I am simply doing the courtesy of shutting someone else's mouth when everyone is too afraid to admit that they're causing a lot of noise.

"Sakura, Kakashi wants to see you." Yamato says, a couple of minutes after the silence.

Sai stands up and wipes the blood from his mouth (again). He wasn't hurt emotionally or physically. It appears that pain was nothing to him.

"I'm on my period." I say. "I'm going home."

Naruto teleported to me, fast. "I'll take care of her." 

His yellow flash still burns, though I don't care how much he can do that or how much high that brightness is. I'll launch my patriotic fist towards Sai. I'll send him to Mars. 

The gang lingers to wait for us. Naruto stares at Yamato, his teeth wide on a full grin. "Tell Kaka-sensei we're sending him our love."

"You two are getting away with everything."

"He's an asshole, captain. Believe it."

"He's here for a reason." Yamato's face hardens. 

"I don't think he'll stay here long enough with an atittude like that." Naruto says. 

Yamato let us go, erasing the music notes on the board. When I turn around, the gang is still here. 

Momentarily 

"I can't believe it, that guy really looks like him!" Kiba stars, later on added in wonder, "I wonder if he smokes weed."

"Weed is different from Marijuana, apparently." Shino says. "I haven't tried it, but I had my bugs for experiment. They go insane."

We all become silent. Shino is weird, our voices say out loud, submerged in the wind. I know what our next topic is going to be: me.

"Are you okay now, Sakura? You look pressured there." TenTen says.

No, I am NOT okay. I want to go out on a party and make out with Naruto, but I can't do that, right? Because I am a stupid girl! A woman!

"You've tried tampons?" Neji says, surprisingly. I hate the fact we've become seatmates he's more of an ass now. A cuckoo clock I can't dismiss.

No, I won't. It's painful and unbearable! How can you wear that?!?

"You want to drop by at Starbucks? I have my mom's credit card. I need coffee." Ino says.

Oh, because you are ALL so flexible. You can go to hell.

"Man, Math sucks. Who doesn't want to go to school tomorrow?" Shikamaru asks. Everyone raises their hand, except for me who thinks it's a waste of penny to agree with something they already know the answer. What the fudging fvck?

"Seriously, don't talk to me." I say to Lee, who was asking if I was alright. I apologized later on. Lee is the most sweetest person I know and I can't blame him for caring, at the same time I can't blame Kami for blessing me an organ that I will have to use in the mere future but at the mean time, I'll suffer because of it.

"Sakura, don't be a bitch!" Someone said that. I know that voice. I know that word. More importantly I know my best friend. I turn around to look at Ino, not regretting anything, even a little bit. "What did you just call me??"

"Okay someone has to take you home really quick, because you're infecting everyone's mood today." Kiba says, blocking himself in front of me and Ino. The fire between me and my not-so-best-friend-today only tensed further.

"I'LL TAKE HER." Naruto giggles, pulling me away from my friends. "So baby, where do you wanna go?"

"I need to go to the bathroom!" I scream, unable to contain the sleaziness I feel.

"That's right. Take her. Somewhere far far away from here." Temari says as she arrives, standing next to Shikamaru. "Shika, I don't freak out like that when I'm..."

"You're worse. You punch everyone in the gut." Shika says, laughs a little. Temari clings in his arm sweetly, the way I'd hug anyone who gives me a whole box of pizza. They watch us go, two crazy youngsters PDA, arguing like there's no tomorrow. I feel like we're married. I feel like there is an invisible ring wrapped around my finger, linking myself to him.

"There's a cab!" Naruto says. "Come on, I'll take you to... Uh... My house!"

"But I don't want to go anywhere, I want to go home and take a darn nap!"

Naruto turns his head to me. "You're cuter when you're angry."

"Naruto, let go of me. If you don't I swear I'll give you a black eye."

Naruto turns his head swiftly, stops fidgeting. It was me who was holding onto him. Naruto doesn't let go of my hand. He stares at me for a bit, his blue eyes on point. I always thought he had dark blue eyes like Ino. But Naruto, unlike Ino, has his beautifully as if his father was a God, those eyes that could stun even the darkest part of a devil.

"Try me."

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6.12.15

Happy Independence day, my fellow filipinos!! Full filipino at heart here:-)

Here is Sakura on beast mode. Scary.