Deafening silence fell over the room, a layer of tenseness befalling the atmosphere. All those who found themselves roped into the suddenness of the situation seemed to grow fearful of the brewing storm. I heard the scuttling of feet as a nurse ran away from the scene upon hearing my voice. In the moment, I couldn't care less if I terrified those around me, or if I made a commotion. 

How could I focus on that?

While they were busy rescuing Eri, I was knocked out in a room next to her cell. Had the heroes not tried to look in other rooms to find the girl? Had they been so preoccupied with saving her that they couldn't even assign some minor task forces to go looking for me? 

I scoffed as this thought led me to another realization.

Forget about sending policemen -- they hadn't even come to the base looking for me, despite knowing that the League was affiliated with the Shie Hassaikai. It was only a coincidence that they happened to stumble across me after the fight, when searching the rooms. If they hadn't scoured the place, I would still be there. 

And what ridiculous notions I had thought of during my rescue.

People had come for me.

The idea that echoed through my mind at the time now filled my head with a vile sound. I clenched my jaw and bit the inside of my cheek so hard it drew blood. The metallic taste spread across my tongue, coating it with the lacquers of the realist, of the one that has been exposed to the undying and unforgiving truth. 

What a joke.

I'd perceived everything wrong. I should've known it sooner that my hope was baseless and false.

Nobody shouted my name when they busted down the door. Nobody came looking for me during the fight. Nobody's purpose being there was to find me.

They'd come for Eri. 

Because she was this precious opportunity. 

And what about me?

I was not a high enough bounty for them to retrieve when faced with a matter such as the confrontation of the yakuza. In this sense, Shigaraki was right. I was enough to make them worry, enough to cause a small panic, but ultimately, not enough to be prioritized or thought of in the face of multiple crises. 

Not enough to be considered, even when I was dying.

I finally looked up at the trio of men with glossy eyes.

"Why didn't you come to save me?" I asked, voice barely above a whisper. Aizawa hesitated for a moment before replying. He knew what I meant, but needed time to formulate an appropriate response, one that didn't give away much, but still sounded alright.

"The Hassaikai Organization almost turned the entirety of Japan upside down because of their bullets, (L/N). Destruction was inevitable if we passed this plan of attack."

He said this, but I knew what he would have stated if he actually had a backbone.

"Every mission needs a priority, (L/N). The priority was Eri, not you."

And it hurt. 

But I understood. 

Damn it all, I understood.

Not everyone could be saved. 

There were priorities that heroes had to maintain, and I just wasn't one of them.

But it wasn't fair. I couldn't seem to accept it. If I had a quirk, would I have been more important? If I weren't so average, so detached from the hero society, would I have been more important? 

And if the mission failed, would the heroes even come for me? Or would I have bled to death, cold and alone?

With this notion, something snapped inside of me.

I found my mouth moving on its own accord.

"I know that you have priorities for missions! But I was kidnapped, not to mention for the second time, not to mention that it was during my internship! The time where I actually felt safe and wanted!" I started to cry from the buildup of emotion that pounded my head and hammered my chest. My conscience pleaded for me to stop talking because it knew that I understood them. Despite this, I continued, completely ignoring its cries.

"This shit happened before!" I exclaimed, waving my hands around wildly in a rage, "I told you what happened both times! You should have been more aware of what the League is capable of! You should know what they're capable of! I nearly died from blood loss!" 

A voice in my head screamed at me to stop, to admit that I understood them. Then everything would be okay. But I couldn't control myself, nor the words that flew freely from my mouth. The room stilled as I curled my fingers and dug my fingernails into my calloused palms. 

"And I dared to confide in you while you were keeping secrets from me." I laughed through my tears, feeling my heart swell with an unimaginable amount of shame. "I dared to confide in you and trust you and believe that I was so important in your eyes. Where has my naivety gotten me?" I shook my head, still trapped in a disbelieving stupor. I couldn't think, words still tumbling past my lips unconsciously, smashing the ears of those who listened.

"I don't know for how long I was missing. I had no sense of time, nor day. I was stripped of my senses and left to rot in a cell. And I no longer cared at that point! The only string that connected me with reality was the false hope that you would come -- that you would come to rescue me.

"But did you come for me? Did you think that the investigation of the Shie Hassaikai would lead to me? Or was it a mistake? A fluke? 

"If you didn't find her, would you have abandoned me? Would you have rescued me if your mission failed? Would you still have searched the place?

"Or would I have died because of you?" The air stilled for half a second as I drew in a breath, preparing for the flood, the storm, the moment in which everything would fall apart.

"Was I not important enough?" I shouted, balling up both of my fists as hefty streams of tears shot down my cheeks. My breath began to grow labored as I became more frenzied, desperate for an answer, any answer, any response.

"Was I not good enough for you? Tell me! Just tell me! Please!"

Silence overtook the room again as the last of my words died down, reduced to small echoes at the ends of the hallway. The quiet room aided my racing mind, spurring it to reach, not jump to, another conclusion. I paused and fixed my posture, unclenching my hands and smiling madly. 

I then turned to Midoriya.

"And you lied, didn't you Izuku?" The green-haired male widened his eyes in surprise. I scoffed as he made no attempt to deny my accusation.

"You didn't invite me here because you wanted a friend, or you wanted me to see Eri. You brought me here because you wanted me to know. You wanted me to know everything. You wanted me to know that heroes had disregarded my kidnapping case to take down yakuza task forces, didn't you?" 

When he remained speechless and motionless, I slammed my foot against the ground.

"Didn't you?" I yelled. Deku quickly nodded and I relented, straightening my back and shooting him, along with the two UA staff members, a mocking grin.

Don't do it. Don't do it, (Y/N), you're better than this, my conscience prayed, He cares for you. He cares for you so much. He only did this because the heroes didn't allow for him to search for you during the raid. You were on his mind. You're his friend, (Y/N), please. It's not his fault. It's not his fault that things ended up like this. Don't be irrational. 

Don't mess up your friendship.

Oh, God.

"Are you happy?" I said loudly, spreading my arms, "Are you happy with the result? Because wow, thank you! Thank you for this enlightenment! Thank you for your kindness and virtuous gift!"

My smile dropped and my garishness ceased the moment my stare fell onto Izuku's face and realized that his eyes were brimming with tears. I covered my mouth with both hands and started to shake.

You're an idiot. You're an idiot. You're an idiot.

Stuttering out a trembling breath, my pupils darted left and right to see the reactions of All Might and Aizawa. 

On their faces were the expressions of absolute horror.

I felt like vomiting.

God, what have I done?

Fuck, I didn't know.

Why would I assume? Why would I think that I knew him and his intentions? I could not hear his thoughts. I could not feel his emotions. I was not him. I was not any of them.

Why did I act like I knew them? Why did I assume what they were thinking? Why did I try to make sense of it all? Was it for myself? Was it so that I could feel less horrible about the brashness of my actions? 

"I'm so stupid." A terrified smile spread across my features as I found myself unable to cope with what I had done. I grabbed at my neck when I felt my throat start to close up and my insides start to squirm. Tears poured incessantly from my eyes while I sobbed, gasping for air whenever hiccups weren't causing my organs to jump. 

"(L/N), calm down." Aizawa's voice somehow broke through the initial panic, but it wasn't enough. I kept hyperventilating, suffocated by clouds of fear, self-blame, and dread. My legs felt like jelly but I needed to move. 

I needed to go. 

"(Y/N), please." Deku's wailing was one of hopeless despair, and hidden underneath it was a tone that revealed the reason for his tears, his worries, and his motives. "I just wanted to help you, (Y/N). I just wanted to help."

I looked at him and smiled. 

"I know. I'm sorry."

I turned a shoulder, then I ran away.