~仕始める~

"Pardon me?" I leaned forward, waiting for Senjuro to repeat himself.

"Can you draw my brother for me? I'm sorry for the sudden request, but I'm not sure when I'll see you again." Senjuro stood straight as if trying to look confident, but his face was scrunched.

"I don't know what your brother looks like though..."

"He looks just like father and I, except he's much more confident, there was never a moment he didn't wear a smile," He started, "He died at the hands of an upper moon, I miss his little encouragements so much—" His own voice got caught in his throat, grief practically radiated from him.

Quiet wails of pain came from him, his body lightly shook in a silent agony.

"I don't care if it was more than a couple months ago! I miss him still!" He completely broke down in the middle of the kitchen, lightly rubbing his body on the floor beneath him.

"I can't be happy! Not like this! It's too hard!"

His shaking became more violent.

"Blood demon art: Vulnerability of the soul."

This small request of a mere drawing turned into a sobfest, not that I'm complaining. Senjuro desperately needed to cry out his feelings, he's been bottled up for God knows how long. This was a push for him in the right direction.

I didn't have very many demon arts, this one was based off of Tamayo's illusion art. I completely changed the feel of the room to feel safe and secure, which allowed Senjuro to become as vulnerable as he needed to be. His cries were painful, they reminded me of the weeks of raw screaming that Yushiro had done. Even when they're gone demons cause so much pain.

"Come back aniki! Come back!" He begged, rubbing his body on the ground more hoping someone could hear his pathetic pleas.

It hurt.

I couldn't do much as he drew himself into a panic attack, I could only soothe him by offering my shoulder to cry on.

"It's okay now, he's in a better place now," I said to him as he screamed into my chest.

"I don't care! I want him here with me! I don't care if it's selfish!"

The both of us sat on the floor embracing each other, his sobs and the quiet boiling of noodles were the only thing that filled the room. Before long he laid unconscious in my arms.

Something filled my stomach and chest, something I hadn't felt in a long time.

Warmth.

For some reason I'm happy, I hope I helped him even if it was a little bit. I carried him and wandered the house hoping to find a bedroom and I set him in the first futon I had encountered. After that I tried to save the remnants of the lunch Senjuro had started.

"Shit, the noodles burned,"

~休憇~

I had a feeling that Senjuro wouldn't have woken up by the time I had finished the meal he had begun preparing. So I instead made a cold soba he and his father could enjoy whenever the both of them woke up. Before I took my leave I gave him my full name and address in case he ever needed help of any kind on a small piece of paper. I apologized for the trouble and wished him and his father good wishes. I had checked to make sure Senjuro hadn't caught a fever too, but it seems he just burned himself out.

As reluctant as I was to do it, I dressed myself in my wet clothes again and left the pretty yukata where Senjuro had slept.

Soon the sun had set and both of the Rengoku's were still sound asleep, and I took my leave. The small window of time allowed me to picture Senjuro's older brother and do a light sketch of him. I hope I got it, even if it's a little bit right. Hopefully this moment set Senjuro's heart at ease, even if it was a little I'll be happy. I am a little disheartened that I have to leave so soon. I hope at least one of them will reach out to me. The walk home to say the least, was very boring and dull. The violent summer showers were reduced to a peaceful drizzle, my umbrella seemed to have holes so I didn't bother using it at all. The canvas bag filled with paints wasn't ruined, but the paper in the sketchbook was worn from all the rain and I'll probably have to buy new ones. Seeing my home become closer and closer made my legs feel weaker by the step. Relief flooded my chest and the only thing I wanted to do was sleep for the rest of eternity, I felt more drained for some reason.

"Oh thank God, you're not dead!" I was welcomed with rough hands on my shoulders.

"You said you'd be gone for 'a little while!' Not an entire day, dammit! What the hell happened?"

Yushiro's face was contorted to one of concern, he looked as if he wanted to cry.

"Sorry, I ran into some trouble." I had said, not meeting his energy.

"Trouble? It was cloudy all day, what do you mean trouble? Why are you so wet?" Yushiro lightly shook my shoulders.

"I dropped my umbrella and it got holes in it so I gave up. I can't get colds so I'm not too concerned about it," I explained to him, his face only becoming more and more contorted with confusion.

"What's with your tone? You sound so worn out," His brows had furrowed more.

"You saying that made me realize how tired I am, I wanna take a nap..." I had gone limp while my hair had stuck to my face.

Before Yushiro could protest against my actions, I fell straight into his chest. The last thing I heard was his yelp as he had fallen backwards before sleep had taken me away.

~休憇~

A reoccurring thing seemed to be happening often: coming home wet and cold. Yushiro ended up scolding me pretty badly before hitting me in the head with a pan. Apparently he got super flustered when he caught a glimpse of my cleavage while my clothes were still soaked. He left me to sleep in cold and wet clothes, but at least he set me down in my futon.

The next day to say the least, was quieter than usual. Yushiro didn't make any cocky remarks or silly complaints, and I couldn't think of anything to say that would piss him off enough. I never told him about what had happened between me and the Rengoku family. I knew if he were actually interested or cared at all, he'd reach out to me, so I wasn't too worried about it. Yushiro wasn't one to start a conversation at all, he would only ask you questions and that was about it. He was one of those 'speak only when spoken to' kind of people. I'm not complaining at all, the silence is nice but an awkwardness was beginning to grow throughout our home in only a couple of days.

The both of us were in a room together that was filled with canvases and paints, the both of us were painting scenes from books. I guess Yushiro couldn't stand the growing uncomfortable atmosphere anymore.

"I want you to be completely honest with me, do you hate being here with me?"

His question seemed to make me flinch, he sounded so insecure.

"Being here? With you?" I played dumb as he nodded at me, refusing to look at me.

"No, I like being here. There's no place I'd rather be and no person I'd rather live with," I felt as if I couldn't have a conversation with him while his face was turned away from me.

"But, do you really? You seem so secretive all the time it makes me wonder." Yushiro's voice had become more monotone and dull, as if he didn't really care about the subject.

"What do you mean secretive?" I leaned toward him more.

"You never tell me what's going on with you, just a few days you left and I thought you might've never come back!" His voice had escalated to a yell.

He was referring to when I was at the Rengoku Estate, I had yet to explain myself to him...

"I didn't think you would care!" My voice rose unconsciously too.

"What do you mean I wouldn't care? I care about you dumbass!" He finally turned his head to look at me with his face furious.

I never doubted his feelings towards me at all, I guess I neglected them more than I had realized.

"I'm sorry," was all I could muster.

~終了~