he could tell it was morning but the sun was barely up yet. waking up like that brought his heart to go completely nuts. maybe it was breaking already at the sight of the white sheets that pooled by his tangled feet. maybe this wasn't the ideal way to wake up next to his ex. but deep inside, he wished to wake up next to him every single day for the rest of his life.

jaehyun, you're getting married. his conscience reminded.

but he didn't care. just the night before, he already said that he was ready to leave everything behind for him. where did that even come from? his thoughts rambled.

it came from nowhere. which means, he really meant it. that's jaehyun.

maybe after all this time, it wasn't really jungwoo. maybe after all this time, it's still taeyong and no one else. but how was he going to make it right now? his thoughts were scattered, the love of his life was nowhere to be found.

taeyong left him again.

what was he going to do? he's getting married to the most perfect human on earth and he had the gut to cheat on him using his ex? but what was he supposed to do anyway, taeyong was already back. and so he just grabbed the chance.

maybe he shouldn't have. even if he hasn't told jungwoo, it's still wrong.

speaking his mind the night before didn't feel wrong, however. how could i mean that? he thought. because it's taeyong. his conscience answered. because taeyong has always been the one.

he finally got up and made up his mind. he was really ready to leave everything behind for taeyong. he looked around trying to find his phone buried on the sheets or under the pillows but his hand found something just by taeyong's pillow. it was a letter.

"don't come find me." it read. inside jaehyun's head, it was all clear. he's leaving again. he thought. but he didn't mind it. whatever comes his way, he'll ignore it. he'll push it away. just to get to taeyong.

he probably hasn't left yet, i was awake at 4. he said inside his head and tried to hurry up wearing his clothes.

when he reached his apartment, not only was taeyong not there, but the rest of the furniture left were covered in white sheets. he really left. his heart cracked for a moment. he couldn't believe his eyes.

he ran out of the room, out of the building going to his car parked up the front. before he could get in, a familiar voice stopped him.

"jaehyun!" he turned around to see his best man. "what are you doing here?" he asked. but he couldn't say he was trying to find taeyong. he would flip out. "i-i was..."

"are you trying to go after taeyong?" johnny added. how did he figure that out now?

"dude, when were you gonna tell me about him?" ahh of course. he's great at finding out about people.

"john, i get it, you figured it out. can you stay out of my way for once? i need to go find him." his voice was already shaking. his nose bridge was hurting trying to contain his tears. but he tried to keep it cooled down because he didn't want to cry in front of johnny.

he opened his car and tried to hop in to leave johnny but he was, again, stopped. "i know where he is." he looked back.

"i'm your best friend, jae. but jungwoo didn't deserve this." i know he doesn't. he thought. "you did him way wrong."

his shut his eyes tight and gripped on the car door too hard. "but as i said, i'm your best friend. i will understand you." johnny stepped a little closer to him. "he's boarding in 20 minutes." airport's not that far. jaehyun thought. i can make it.

he was about to step inside his car but he looked at johnny who gave him the look full of hope. inside, he was still hoping for jaehyun to reach his goal. even if his friends get left behind.

jaehyun walked towards him quick and gave him a rather tight hug. "thank you, john." he whispered. johnny returned the hug and whispered right next to his ear. "go, jae. you're running out of time."

johnny watched as his best friend climbed in the driver's seat and drove like a racer. i hope you get him, buddy.

with his airpods in, he walked along the carpet floors trying to find something to do before he gets on the plane. his bag was hanging on his shoulder and he was slowly getting tired. he decided to go back and sit since he's about to get in the plane for the next 5 minutes. it was better to wait.

once he sat, he watched the sun rising slowly through the glass windows. the sun is barely up yet. he thought. jaehyun's probably not even up yet either. he sighed and placed his bag down along with his important documents. 

why am i even waiting? it's not like he's coming. taeyong doubts his appearance too. he's already at the boarding gate and there was no way jaehyun was going through all the sections just to go see him.

and he's getting married. it's pretty clear they're not reconciling. if he lets it, it's like losing his love for himself.

and then he felt his presence. right next to him. jaehyun... he didn't even have to look up to see him because his right airpod was already taken out of his ear. "what are you doing here?"

you could've guessed it was taeyong who asked that, but no, it's jaehyun who wanted to know why he was escaping him again. for the second time.

"what?" was all he could say.

jaehyun took the seat beside him and sat calmly. it's like he hasn't been chasing taeyong and running around for about 10 minutes. he definitely looked like he just got out of bed too.

taeyong saw the ticket he held. he was so perplexed when he had the time to get his passport and all. going to the airport without a luggage, buying a ticket and chasing after the love of his life to the boarding gates--jaehyun wasn't playing around. obviously, he knows how to chase someone from the airport, he's done it before.

he's not talking me out of this, he definitely can't. taeyong thought crossing his arms. no words were exchanged until, of course, jaehyun spoke first. "remember when i used to keep my passport in the compartment of my car?" he chuckled lowly.

"this time it definitely came in handy." he faced his ex-lover who just tried to ignore his presence. 4 minutes till i'm out of here. "you're leaving again." he stated.

"didn't i tell you to not look for me?" taeyong asked still keeping his face away from the man.

"yeah but i couldn't help it." jaehyun answered. taeyong turned to face him when jaehyun looked down on his hands. he saw the ticket and raised his eyebrow. "a ticket to manila?" taeyong scoffed looking away. "you came prepared."

"taeyong, don't you wanna stay with me?" he asked.

this time taeyong turned to face him with a slight scowl on his face. "and expect me to be the other man? the kept man who you hide in your condo because you don't want your husband to find out you're having a secret affair with the ex? huh-uh no, i don't think so." he replied with a sarcastic yet small smile. "i'm not going to be a homewrecker for your benefit, jaehyun."

"you're not." jaehyun said. he held his hand before saying, "i told you, i'm ready to leave everything behind for you. we'll go to paris and start a new life. isn't that what you want?"

with tears starting to form, he still looked at him directly at the eye. "do you hear yourself jaehyun? no, that is not what i want." he said with gritted teeth. "i don't want that you would leave your fiance for me. i don't want that your friends would leave you because you left a perfectly good man for the stripper you hooked up in your bachelor party. you know why? because people will think of that everytime they see me, everytime they think of me. i am going to be the person who ruined jungwoo's life because you can't keep it in your damn pants. everybody will look down on me, do you understand that?"

you promised the world and i fell for it

there was a bell sound. he was about to leave. "flight 421 to paris, france is ready to board in gate 21a. passengers, please have your boarding pass and identification ready. thank you."

i put you first and you adored it
set fires to my forest

they both watched as the people start to line up and the line reaching far. so maybe this could be the chance to talk one last time.

jaehyun can see the pain hidden in his eyes. he can't bear seeing taeyong cry again. "but taeyong, this time we can make it right. we lost the chance years ago, we can make it again."

and you let it burn
sang off-key in my chorus

"no, we can't make it again. because you are years too late, jaehyun." he removed his hands holding his. "when i left i told you to wait, didn't i?"

"we broke up because you didn't want me to go. you gave me an ultimatum but i said i will go because paris was my dream. it was my dream and you didn't support that dream. do you remember what you did now?" tears escaped from his eyes.

"6 years ago i asked for you to wait. i hoped for you to wait but you didn't. and 6 years later you found someone else and you're already getting married." he said as a whisper in the end. "jaehyun, you didn't wait."

to love, love, yeah
to love, love, yeah
to love, yeah
i needed to hate you to love me, yeah

"but 6 years was long, taeyon--"

"yes it was 6 damn years. but you know what you did? you made me choose between my dream and the love of my life. you don't do that to someone you love, jaehyun. you were ready to keep me in a cage."

this time, it was jaehyun letting out his long-kept tears of his own. he was feeling it again. the love of his life leaving him. maybe sex wasn't the only thing you thought you needed from him. maybe after all this time, he's still the one. and his conscience tried to knock some sense into him too.

to love, love, yeah
to love, love, yeah
to love, yeah
i needed to lose you to love me

taeyong stood up as the line was getting shorter. he was going to be the last one to enter the plane. "but tae..." he held his hand one more time. "taeyong, i love you."

"you don't love me, jaehyun." he whispered. "you think you do but you don't. know why? because i came back. i made a promise to never come back here, because you're here. don't you see? we don't work."

"i can leave him. i'll leave him and i'll be with you again. taeyong, i want to be with you." the man begged.

"do you hear yourself, jaehyun? you can't do this. not to jungwoo, not him who's been nothing but an angel. jaehyun, jungwoo doesn't deserve this. he doesn't deserve either of us. he gave you a chance." he answered.

to love, love, yeah
to love, love, yeah
to love, yeah

jaehyun was losing his breath. was this real? yes. "i stayed away from you so i can move on. do you know how hard that was? please don't make it harder for me again. years ago, i thought i had you but you left me too. and now you were years too late."

he carried his bag and proceeded to walk to the attendants but jaehyun chose to cling to him tighter as he walked to the doors. "taeyong, you can't!" a little louder and he would've caused a scene. which they kind of are.

and now the chapter is closed and done

"jaehyun, let go." taeyong muttered as he closed his eyes keeping his tears in. "sir, are you boarding the plane?" he gave his boarding pass to the attendant and the rest of the staff watched in silence as jaehyun tried to make taeyong stay. it was the two of them left to board the plane.

taeyong used all his strength to pull jaehyun's grip away and held his hand one last time. "sir... your passport."

to love, love, yeah
to love, love, yeah
to love, yeah

"what about me? you're just gonna leave me?" and there they were. back to where they had to part years ago. it pained them that this was the exact position, exact place, exact same person they're facing.

"you're getting married." he says. "we can't be together."

and it's like breaking up all over again.

and now it's goodbye, it's goodbye for us

(A/N: i didn't mean to hurt u. if ever u were hurt.)